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The power to express…….:

People who have read some of my works (there are very few such people and even fewer works to choose from really) say that though I don’t possess much stuff to tell stories from. I just express myself rather well when it comes to writing….express myself…?! Ha! The only one who can express oneself or others is Mamata Banerjee, the Hon’ble Railway Minister…duronto….she is the one who can mail, express or passenger (trash) somebody or something. Chased the Nano right out of Bengal

However, my works or rather my expressions (if you prefer) are exclusively not for those and definitely not for you if:

i) If you think that any more than 0.000001% of Pakistanis want to live peacefully with Indians.

Add another zero before 1 if this means the numbers of such Pakistanis is in double digits. The only ones whose are thinking of sustaining peace with India are those looking forward to having a free surgery for their kid since this is gonna cost a packet in the only other suitable destination for surgeries, the US of A.

Anyways, the ones coming to India for even this are those who can actually afford to have this done in the States too, but then it means going through a full body scan (which might show up the explosives hidden permanently in the genitalia) and then saving money was always a far attractive option…to be spent for a vacation in Kabul, the only city un-safer than Peshawar. The ‘peace-with-India’ mindset (an abnormal state of mind in Pakistan) goes to ‘Bash-India’ mindset once the freebies have been devoured.

How about Surgery in Pak?! Doctor Taliban is conducting mass surgeries every week where limbs and torsos are amputated whether you need them or not. And all this absolutely free free free!

Other conditions for reading this blog:

Don’t read this blog ever again:

ii) If you think LK Advani will become the Prime Minister of India.

iii) If you think Rahul Gandhi will NOT become the Prime Minister of India.

iv) If you think Rahul Mahajan’s second marriage will last beyond 3 years.

v) If you think Rakhi Sawant is talented (Kinky, isn’t it?! Rakhi follows Rahul who follows Rahul.

Pramod Mahajan added the last L to his son’s name purely by chance. If he had to have a second chance at producing another gifted son like that, I have no doubt that he would have named him Ketul. Get it?! Rahul and Ketul! As in Rahu/Ketu.

I wonder what would have happened if Rakhi had been one of the contestants in Rahul’s Swayamvar or vice versa i.e. if Rahul had been one of the claimants for Rakhi’s hand!

Whooooosh! NDTV would have had to merge with Sony or was it colors?! The new channel would have been SONDY TV or Nolors).

With the kind of drug overdose that nearly killed poor Rahu …err Rahul, I’m very inclined to believe that he must be the Taliban’s MFC ….most favoured customer…..dumpkoff! (See…I know some German too). Headlines should have declared: Doctor Taliban delivers the ‘peace-of-mind’ powder to its dearest MFC Rahul.

The MFC follows the acronym MFN that Americans had coined in the days when imports from China had not yet shut almost all of the manufacturing facilities in the States. Those were the good ol’ days…unlike today where the US is bending over to correct its balance of Trade with China, in those days its was bending over to control the same with Japan.

And dear Rahul nearly shakes hand with St. Peter up there. Poor Peter! Missed his mentor-to-be by a whisker…err a fag…a joint!! Don’t know what name the folks up there have for it: heroin wrapped in a five hundred Rupee note/bill …..

On second thoughts it wasn’t the powder that tried to kill him. It was the 5C note. A fake 500 Rupee note manufactured by the evil-two-eyed Prez Musharraf at one of his secret fake note printing locations in Peshawar or some other similar place where a plot of land was purchased to set up the factory for fake notes.

And this top secret/confidential/for-your-eyes-only information comes from none other than the ghost-writer of Parvez Musharraf’s biography (or was it an auto-biography…the ghost writer claims that he wrote Musharraf’s history in the most turbulent of times…which is when you are travelling from Rohini to Rithala in Delhi during the construction of the Delhi Metro in an Auto Rickshaw.

Answer this quiz: A biography written while riding an ‘Auto’ is called an ___ ____.

Gimme a joint… Gimme a joint…. Gimme a joint! I need the 500 Rupees notes. Fake or otherwise As many as you can get me. You can have the powder within for all I care. The fake notes, I hear are so good that banks have actually started demanding more of them as they are good, feel good, last longer and best of all … are foreign made. The last condition appeals very strongly to most of us middle class Delhi walla types to whom the ‘made in India’ tag symbolises a huge loss of quality (except if made in China, which is worse..even obnoxious).

And yes, ever since the Telgi scam at the Nashik press, you have even Government facilities innocently churning out fakes. Did I hear ‘Who the hell is Telgi and where in the Andamans is Nashik’?

Get out of the hole KIDS…..!!

Read on




Hi Folks!
Been a terribly long time since I've been hearing of Blogs, Blogging and Bloggers. And now that I've got to it, there is not much that I can think of. Anyways, if you do get the time and the energy to go through the blogs, remember that there is a lot coming up and not too far away. This was just a trial. Keep reading this blogger for more.

For a couple of hours though, I added a full length article and then deleted it from this blog. I'd like to check the saleability of the article before hoing any further.

Arnab

I have been writing for sometime. Unfortunately, I can't find a publisher, even though most people who have read it agree that it's pretty good stuff.

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Comments

raj said…
Wonderful arnab. I was not knowing you are such a smart blogger. Keep it up janu. My best wishes with you always.
August 20, 2017 at 11:43 AM
arnab said…
Thank you my dear. Words like those are quite motivating. I wish I could write more and post more too often
October 16, 2021 at 2:02 AM
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